Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Chap Goh Mei

Terrible headache today so here's my lame attempt at humour:

It's the last day of what constitutes the Chinese New Year celebrations, time to break out the Chinese New Year statistics:

  • Net loss from illegal gambling activities = RM4.20.
  • Number of different gambling games played = 3 ( Big Two, BlackJack and Mahjong ).
  • Number of Chinese New Year dinners attended = 7 dinners at 7 different restaurants.
  • Number of times Yee Sang was served = 6 times ( 4 with salmon, 2 with jellyfish ).
  • Number of Mandarin Oranges consumed = 3 versus about 50 when I was younger.
  • Number of Ang Pows collected = 32 red packets.
  • Total sum of Ang Pow money = 4 digits away from a million.
  • Total number of times the phrase "This better be your last year receiving Ang Pow" was heard = 23 times.
  • Total number of times the question "When are you getting married?" was heard = 37 times.
  • Most expensive lunch I had to pay for during Chinese New Year ( when typically prices are inflated ) = RM70 for two noodle dishes for 4 persons!
  • Number of times sleep was interrupted by illegal release of fireworks and firecrackers = 15 times which basically means every night.
  • Number of times I was blasted with the word "Choy" when accidently uttering an inauspicious word or two = 18 times.
  • Number of lottery tickets bought while feeling lucky = 10.
  • Number of lottery tickets that were lucky = Zero. RM30 down the drain.
  • Cans of beer consumed = Zero! Honest!
  • Cans of Jolly Shandy consumed = not too sure... can't count in a drunken state.
  • Number of annual leaves taken to take advantage of the Chinese New Year holidays = 3 days for a total of 10 days uninterrupted absence from work!!!.
  • Amount of money spent on clothes = RM800+ but I still look like crap.
  • Number of mandarin oranges thrown into the river by Siew Toh = 23.
  • Number of mandarin oranges floating down river caught by me = 5. I fell down the boat after number 5.
  • Number of shoes lost to the river = 1. Now I have half a pair of new Adidas shoes!

Ok I was mostly kidding. Most of it never happened ^_^

posted by wyejon at Wednesday, February 23, 2005 (permalink) |

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